FOOLISH DREAM

I am so in like. 

I can't even fall asleep without pretending he's with me.

But it is just a foolish dream that I'm not even sure can come true.

But we don't give up.

We keep trying,

We keep dreaming,

And we keep waiting.

To my friend - I like you!

I am proud to call you my husband.

I love when we talk about glitter

and the names of our future children

and Don Land.

I can't wait for picnics

and trips to Elizabethtown, Kentucky.

I'll be Claire and you'll be someone similar to Drew - but even cooler

But you'll call me Tabz. 

You are my prince even though you don't have a horse or a crown.

I wouldn't like you if you did.

<3

     I love Bobby Lee.  "Attitudes and Feelings, Both Desirable and Sometimes Secretive" is the best show ever. <3 Seriously.  Look it up on Youtube.

I met some amazing people yesterday! ^_^  Let's see...

1. Billy.  He was very nice.  He was a rocker. 

2. Melissa.  She was nice too and has a genuine spirit about her.  And she did not go out into the bushes with that man.

3. Mark.  He was nice and genuine as well.

4. Kaysar.  He was quiet and polite and sweet. 

5. George.  He was adorable and sooo sweet and funny. 

6. James.  He was the friendliest of all.  He is just as he is on television and then even better.  He hugged me twice without my even asking for it. 

7. Howie.  He was loud and funny.  I have a hot body.  ^_~

8. Rachel.  She was sweet and beautiful.

9. Flica Flame.  She is the coolest person I have ever came across.  That was some cool rainbow hair.  She has mad love for me.

10. Cecilia.  She was beautiful and so tall.

11. Cristina.  A quiet one, but kind.

12. Jon.  A disappointment.  I felt in the way.

13. Jonny.  He said I was cute but he smelled like cigarettes and looked at me funny. 

14. Mookie.  He was soo adorable and kind.  He said I was cute too.

15. Bri.  She thought I was fourteen.  ^_^ She was beautiful.

16. Rupert.  He was quite friendly. 

I hope I am not forgetting anyone.

Conclusion - guys named Jon are not all that great.

:) Reality TV is cool.  And I think I'm gonna get into Korean dramas.

What's that..? You want a shuffle? You need some music recommendations? Well, okay...if I have to.

01. I Want You to Need Me - Celine Dion

Does she have any songs that I don't like? I think not.  They make me think of my family.  They make me think of my childhood.  They make me think of purity and genuine talent.  This song is beautiful.  I hope to feel about someone this way someday. 

02. Return to Innocence - Enigma

I think I want this played at my wedding - that is, if my husband's cool with Native Americans.  I was thinking about this song one day during highschool and I cried all day.  :/ This makes me think of Man of the House.  A GREAT movie.

03. Love Train - SClub7

It's funny how you can remember where you were when you heard certain songs.  I heard this turning into the drive by my aunt's house.  I'll never forget getting this album.  Oh yeah, there's a Jon in SClub7.  He's probably unfriendly.

04. Live For the One I Love - Celine Dion

Same explanation as 01.

05. All I Can Do - Jump5

I always imagined myself dancing to this at a talent show.  I never got around to that even though I practiced in my head everytime I heard it in the past four years.

06. Ocean - 3LW

A Christian song featuring Kieley and Adrienne before they were Cheetah Girls.  Adrienne has an awesome voice - and I liked Naturi!

07. Do What You Have to Do - Sarah McLachlan

I once read in a review that Sarah sings with confidence.  So I've always thought of that when I hear her.  I love this song. <3 She is amazing.

Currently Listening Life By ZOEgirl Waiting see related

After the Hiatus

                    Hi there Xanga! Wow.  Sorry it's been so long.  Quite a bit has happened with my life since I've last posted.

I'm married now with a baby, and I'm living in Tokyo - and my husband won the lottery! We're living in a castle.

Just kidding.  I'm totally single and ready/not ready to mingle! There's no way I could possibly be pregnant...and I don't live anywhere near Japan, unfortunately.  It's okay, though.  I'm happy with good ol' TN.  And trust me...it'll be a good while before I get married.  I don't live in a castle, but I'd probably get scared or lost in one anyway. 

Well, I was uploading new songs to my iTunes and thought "I miss Shuffle!" So I'm back for that.  We'll get to it in a minuto, kay?

I'm going camping at the end of this month and I am excited about that.  Alsooo...I'm going to a reality television convention, I hope.  I am uberexcited.  I can't wait to meet cool reality show rejects.

So...yeah, my old idiot @$$ boyfriend broke up with me.  I'm cool with it, yo.  You know, he didn't like the music I sincerely and genuinely loved..or the movies.  So now I can Diddy and JT it up all I want.  I can sing along with Rihanna and the Pussycat Dolls.  You take those things for granted, you know.  I also watch Kamikaze Girls at least once a week...and man, does it rock to watch any movie without worrying about someone trying to sneak kisses throughout it!

As for moving on...there are two guys out there I am kinda liking.  I don't know if there's even the slightest possibility I could ever end up with either of them, but I dream anyway. 

Guy number one actually does like me.  And I like him.  He's adorable and funny and smart and sweet.  But he doesn't live in this town.  >.<  He thinks I'm cute...he's even called me beautiful! O.o and he always asks "What was Andrew thinking giving up a girl like you?" ^_^ I am glad he gave me up though.  Otherwise I wouldn't get to talk at all to this amazing person.  He calls me quite a bit.  I can't always answer but when I do it makes me laugh a lot to talk to him.  In a good way!

Guy number two thinks I'm rad but I don't think he likes me likes me, really . It's cool though.  Some of my funnest memories were the little time I spent with him though.  He's a hilarious guy.  Again, there's an incredible distance.  What up with that? & his into me-ness isn't anywhere as close to my into him-ness as it should be, but it's okay. 

I guess Guy Number One takes the lead, even though they're both so unbelievably sweet and perfect.

I'm such a dreaming dork.  & yes, I met both these guys at the anime convention.  ^_~  I'll probably meet the love of my life through anime.  Is that wierd? I don't care.  There was a wedding at the most recent convention between two people who met there and they were so awesome.  It was so sweet.  Heck, I didn't know the people and I was crying.  It was beautiful.  The wife was Holly and I actually worked with her the next day with the fashion show [I was a model! XD]...she is sooo sweet and amazingly beautiful!!! Like O.o wo.

& oh yeah, Lisa Furukawa stopped before the end of the concert and said in front of God and everybody, "Is Tabitha here?" I was on the front row and raised my hand and was like "I'm right here! O.o" and she was like "Oh, there you are! I want to sing "The Lizard and the Turtle" for Tabitha!" YES...that's my favorite Lisa song.  XD I was sooo happy.  This is a true story..though I still feel like it was a dream.  She signed my poster "Thanks for being so sweet."  You're welcome, Lisa.  You're welcome.  ^_~

Okay, the downside of life: my face has broken out a bit so I put that Differen stuff on so now my face is dry and burning.  >.<

But gosh, it feels good to be uploading these songs that I truly love! <3 I can listen to all this Disney music and hip hop and J-pop...I'm no longer limited to listening to only banjo, guitar, piano, and mandolin music.  Don't get me wrong, those things are great but GOSH I need a lot of POP in my life!

You know? I don't think anyone reads my Xanga...it's okay though.  I do enjoy to chitchat to it.  Maybe someone will stumble upon this someday and be like "O.o This chick rocks!"

So if YOU are that person...HELLO.. It's nice to meet you! & follow your dreams! & I love you! & if you ever need anything, I am right here.  Drop me a line! E-mail me! Write me! Send a message in a bottle to me! Tie a letter to a balloon! Send letters by pigeon or owl! Just get in touch with me! <3 ...Unless you're a perv, in which case - pretend you've never came across this because I will get immediate perv vibes and won't give you the time of day.  :)

Do you like the new layout? It's all shiny and sunny. 

Okay, I'm feeling crazy.  How's about a 25 song shuffle!

1. Someday - B*Witched

I love this song.  It reminds me of me so much - always dreaming.  This song mentions moonbeams, rainbows, teacups...all the things that are constantly floating around in my head.  The only line I don't agree with is "Don't tell me I'm a dreamer cause I don't wanna know."  I AM a dreamer and I love to hear it. 

2.  Sweet Surrender - Sarah McLachlan

Wow, this makes me nostalgic.  I bought the B*Witched "Awake and Breathe" CD the same time I bought this CD (along with the Christina Aguilera debut and the 3 of Hearts CD)...I spent that whole night listening to all of the CDs and eating popcorn along in my room.  It was one of the best days of my life.  I love love love this song so so so much.

3.  I Can't Tell You - Yoko Ishida

I know this song really meant a lot to me at one time but to be honest, I can't remember exactly who I was thinking of.  I think I know...but it doesn't seem like I've been listening to Yoko that long.  Hm...  Well, it was important to me at one time and that's all that matters.  It is pretty.

4.  Immortality - Donny Osmond

Wow, I hope no one walks in here to find me looking up pictures of Donny Osmond.  Tehe.  This song is beautiful.  I love Donny's voice.  This song makes me want to cry.

5.  Just Like You - Hannah Montana

Since Graduation, I've been going through like quarterlife crisis or something.  I can't leave behind these poppy things like Disney Channel.  I went ape one day about this and went to SamGoody and bought Hannah Montana, High School Musical, and two Hilary Duff CDs.  The hip chick at the register was probably like O.o and was probably shocked I had a license and a checkbook.  I'm not thirteen, contrary to popular belief.  I wish I was though.  Hey, I'll play along.  I love Hannah Montana.

6.  Monday Morning - Maria Mena

After my first breakup, I spent every single night listening to Maria Mena and feeling like she was the only one in the world who understood me.  I'll never ever forget those nights.  They were what can only be described as the beautiful melancholy of being young and me.  These songs are so special to me and make me want to cry everytime I hear them.

7.  The Getaway - Hilary Duff

I heard this song for the first time this morning when I was with Mama, so it is special to me.  It's a pretty clever song also.

8.  Come Closer - Marit Larsen

Aah...I remember field trips on the way to Nashville, singing this so long and driving Heidi crazy.  That was so much fun.  I just wanted to promote Marit and my soul any way I could.  Gosh, she's adorable! ^_^

9.  Immortality - Celine Dion

This song again.  Just as beautiful as always.  I don't know who's rendition I like more.  But it's just a lovely lovely song that makes me feel tenderhearted everytime.  <3 

10.  Why - M2M

Ahh...when Marit and Marion were so young and so sweet.  I will never ever forget the magic of M2M.  Wow, Shuffling makes me so teary-eyed!

11. Free Up Your Mind - Emma Bunton

Even this makes me want to cry! I love Emma! <3 & Pokemon rules.  This does make me happy though.

12.  Deep River - Utada Hikaru

This song is simply beautiful.  I'll never forget making a mix CD for Morgan.  I didn't really know "Deep River", but I put it on the mix. Morgan told me just a few days after that she had been learning it so I started listening to it and now it's one of my favorite Utada Hikaru songs.  A good Utada Hikaru listen isn't complete without it.

13.  Power of Love - Yoko Ishida

I love all of Yoko's songs.  Why? On the Christmas morning I got these I took a good nap, all the while listening to lovely Yoko.  It was beautiful dreaming. 

14.  Miracle - Cascada

Cascada makes me want to para para like a crazy person.  I love her voice and I don't even mind that most her songs sound similar...they're all great to me...and I know that I'll love them all.

15.  Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy - I'm not even gonna attempt to spell this name.  It's the guy who did the Nutcracker.

Did you know I was in the Nutcracker at the Drama Center when I was a little girl? I was a candy cane.  ^_^  That was magical.

16.  Trauma - Ayumi Hamasaki

Aaah...this lovely para para song! Ayumi teaching the dance is SO cute.  Seriously, it's the cutest thing ever seen with human eyes.

17.  Someday My Prince Will Come - Ashley Tisdale

This is my anthem.  It may sound silly, but this song gives me sooo much hope for me and my future! <3

18.  When There Was Me and You - Vanessa Hudgens

I haven't quite learned to take this song seriously yet but I do love Vanessa.

19.  What If - Lene Marlin

I don't think I've ever really listened to this whole song but I've always kept it around because it sounds cute.

20.  Magic Man - Heart

Eh...my Daddy likes this one.  This isn't of my choice. 

21.  Miracles Happen - Myra

This makes me happy.  The best Disney days were the Myra days! My Myra CD is still so special to me.

22.  Sha La La - The Cooler Kids

"What are you doing the rest of your life?" I LOVE that line.  This song is chill.  I'm glad I gave this album a second chance.

23.  I Wish - Hilary Duff

This song rocks.

24.  Don't Say You Love Me - M2M

Cute.  Not my favorite, but cute! <3 Memories...

25.  Love For All Seasons - Christina Aguilera

This is a sweet song.

Mwah.  <3

 P 415696001 MC 02/02/2007 08:35:22  

...

Currently Watching The Office - Season Two By Steve Carell, John Krasinski, Jenna Fischer, Rainn Wilson, B.J. Novak see related

Bad Dream

So I just woke up a bit ago from a nap which included an awful nightmare!

Okay, so, I'm working in the Office, right.  You know, THE Office.  With Pam and Jim and everyone. 

For some reason or another, Jim is gonna have to be electricuted, which is really awful. 

So Michael notices everyone is a bit stressed so he asks me if I'd like to go with him because he has two tickets to see Deal or No Deal.  So I go.  We get there and the guy sitting next to me [I think it was Kevin] says "You do know they're planning to kill him, right?" And he means Michael.  So Howie Mandel walks out and has a gun and I start thinking "What if he misses and shoots me?" So I tell Michael we better go.

I don't remember if he came with me or not.

But I got to Jim where he was already sitting in the electric chair and here's where it gets sad.  So for some reason, in this dream, I start having flashbacks of all the wonderful times me and Jim have shared.  It turns out we're really close.  So I stay with him while he waits and say sad stuff like "We'll get to hang out in Heaven." which makes him smile a bit, but we're both crying, because he is about to become electricuted.

Then I get sadder because Pam looks sad and I don't know if she's sad because Jim is about to die or if she's just mad that I'm taking up his last minutes.  I don't know.  But I stayed with him a while, then left the room and went back into the office.

I ended up going back to Jim again and there was a woman there [in a nurse's outfit] and she was the one who was gonna electricute Jim.  I think in my dream maybe she'll just electricute herself instead of Jim when she sees how much he means to me, which is strange because really no one should die in this wierd dreamplace.  I don't even know why Jim has to.

But anyway, I just go through the television channels asking Jim what he wants to watch, like what would be the last thing he ever sees on television.  I turn through all the channels, but he really doesn't care about it that much so I just leave it on something, which turned out to be good, but I don't remember what it was. 

Stephen was in there too.  I'm not totally sure why. 

But anyway, it gets closer and closer to the time he has to be electricuted and more and more people from the Office come into the room to watch, which is really disturbing.  I can't watch.  I hug Jim and have a little sentimental talk with him and have to leave.

I don't know if Jim was electricuted or not. 

I woke up sad because I miss Jim now, and I really hope dreamJim was not electricuted.  Or the nurse. 

Buhu.  I feel like crying.  Or watching the Office.